#14: Down One?

Well, I attempted to knock off part of #14 on my list: do 26 nice things for Justin. To accomplish this, I rented a cabin on top of a mountain that allowed dogs in an effort to have a "romantic cabin getaway." Nice for Justin? You decide:

1. On the way there, Hattie the dog got carsick and diarrheaed all over the back of the car. Emergency stop on the side of the highway, 20 miles from any town. Justin holding the two Danes on the side of the road, me cleaning out liquid nastiness with cars whizzing by at 80 miles an hour.

2. FINALLY get to the cabin at 10:00 p.m. and the lady hands me the key and says "I found some droppings under the sink and have laid some live traps. Just can't keep those wood rats out when they do controlled burnings. If you catch a rat, just put it out on the front porch and I'll destroy it. Unless one of your dogs gets it first." AGGGHHHH!

3. Open the door and take a look around. OOPS. The part of the description I overlooked is that these were built in 1930 -- 80 years ago -- and are er, rustic, to say the least. The panic started 10 minutes after we arrived when I was putting up the groceries and found 4 grandaddy longlegs in the span of 30 seconds. I started having visions of them crawling in my nostrils and ears in the middle of the night.

4. The bathroom is tiny and there is no shower. I'm sorry if I offend, but who bathes these days?! Looking at the tub, I didn't even know where to start cleaning myself in it. Especially considering my intense phobia of bath surfaces including porcelain, shower curtains, and sliding doors. Needless to say, there were no showers for the Blands this weekend and for my germ-a-phobe husband who showers twice a day that didn't go over well.

5. We make the bed and I settle in to my own sheets feeling the slightest bit at ease in being in my own linens...UNTIL...I see the tick crawling across Justin's arm. I jump up; cover my eyes; bang my ears like rainman; jump up and down; hyperventilate; try not to cry. Then proceed to check every inch of my body over for ticks -- TWICE.

6. The mattress is super cheap and squeaks if you so much as look at it.

7. At 4:00 a.m. after NO sleep and NO ease and worrying every second that Hattie is going to have a repeat episode of the car, I hear the dogs get out of bed and start walking around. I jump up, leash them, and take them outside; realize quickly that I am super afraid of the dark woods and scream for Justin. Justin comes reluctantly and lets them roam off leash to do their business. 2 seconds later, they are so far into the woods I can no longer hear the jingle tags and they are off. Get the car, drive through the woods whistling out the window, pissing off all our neighbors. Find them, refrain from beating them. The MINUTE we get in from our 4:00 a.m. adventure, Hattie diarrheas all over the cabin floor.

8. Cabin smells like shit for the rest of the weekend.

9. No TV, no Internet, no radio, no phone reception = no fun. And LOTS of sleep

Sunday. 7:42 a.m. The car is packed and we are out of there. On the way back to civilization. (Cautiously watching Hattie's every move to prevent another "accident.") If we ever attempt a "romantic cabin getaway" you can be sure I'll do a little research beforehand. Maybe find a place that has been constructed in the last 10 years, with central heating & air, bug traps, no rats, and new mattresses. ... and a SHOWER :)